it’s not just learning, we have to unlearn the unproductive lessons we learnt in childhood, then rationally learn what we should have been taught , then use that new information a lot until it feels comfortable
It took me a long time for my feelings to catch up with my rational mind when it comes to behaviours/red flags, especially subtle red flags .
I think you’re doing great. 🏆😘
can I say do not be afraid to confront triggers, real triggers that give you strong involuntary emotional reactions
, they are huge clues as to what happened , follow the thought, follow the memories, defuse the trigger
I want to tell you about a date I went on recently.
spoiler
We met at this Cafe I go to a lot, seemed nice, chatted a fair bit.
Made plans to go see a gig.
So far so good.
I turn up. See her at the bar. Walk over and say hi.
The first words out of this woman’s mouth were:
“I’ve got pills and coke”.
Now, I’m not a particularly smart man because my first thought was:
“holy shit this is the one!”
At the same time, I had a second more rational thought:
“Run dipshit. Ruuuuuuun!!!”
What I actually said was:
“yeah cool. Real talk: that’s not my scene hey. I’m going to bail”.
She was pissed off and called me a wanker.
The end.
Okay that made me snort lol which is prolly what she ended up doing too
I’ve decided it’s best for everyone that I find a new Cafe…
On the first date too! Wow!
I mean it could have been a great night 11ish years ago lol
Haha! I think dumpster guy still wins, but that’s a solid Nope story.
My red flag detector is still being calibrated.
yes, this is a thing
it’s not just learning, we have to unlearn the unproductive lessons we learnt in childhood, then rationally learn what we should have been taught , then use that new information a lot until it feels comfortable
It took me a long time for my feelings to catch up with my rational mind when it comes to behaviours/red flags, especially subtle red flags .
I think you’re doing great. 🏆😘
can I say do not be afraid to confront triggers, real triggers that give you strong involuntary emotional reactions , they are huge clues as to what happened , follow the thought, follow the memories, defuse the trigger
I appreciate you posting this :)
My problem is that im an outsider. And outsiders can pick each other out in a room full of people, within seconds.
And there’s an innate magnetism.
Now. Nothing wrong with being attracted to other outsiders. But there’s different flavours and you gotta be careful.
Same regarding outsiders.
There’s a million kinds of outsiders with a myriad of interests and traits and some are good people, some bad, some not so healthy to be around.
Choose your friends wisely. 😘
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The one that got away lol.
She lives rent free in my heart lol
I’d’ve bailed too.
At least she was straight to the point!