LemmyChan
  • Communities
  • Create Post
  • Create Community
  • heart
    Support Lemmy
  • search
    Search
  • Login
  • Sign Up
slothrop@lemmy.ca to The Onion and other satire w/ layers@sh.itjust.worksEnglish · 7 hours ago

RFK Jr.: ‘Time In Hot Cars Helps Babies To Sweat Out Toxins’

theonion.com

external-link
message-square
16
link
fedilink
117
external-link

RFK Jr.: ‘Time In Hot Cars Helps Babies To Sweat Out Toxins’

theonion.com

slothrop@lemmy.ca to The Onion and other satire w/ layers@sh.itjust.worksEnglish · 7 hours ago
message-square
16
link
fedilink
WASHINGTON—In a new claim challenging traditional pediatric norms regarding infant safety, Health and Human Services Secretary Robert F. Kennedy Jr. announced Tuesday that being left in a hot car could “help babies sweat out toxins.” “Roll up the windows, park in a sunny spot, and let the sun do its magic—in a couple hours, your […]
alert-triangle
You must log in or # to comment.
  • VerilyFemme@lemmy.blahaj.zone
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    10
    ·
    1 hour ago

    I ate it.

    • MehBlah@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      5
      ·
      44 minutes ago

      No shame. I had to check the community first.

  • HubertManne@piefed.social
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    1
    ·
    27 minutes ago

    Its funny how far they have to go to achieve satire and even then my wife was like. Did he actually say that. I mean there is the cocaine thing recently.

  • sad_detective_man@sopuli.xyz
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    5
    ·
    2 hours ago

    One of these days bro is gonna drink his own piss just to show is how healthy he is. I know it.

    • KelvarCherry [They/Them]@lemmy.blahaj.zone
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      2
      ·
      40 minutes ago

      He swam in sewage-tainted water to “disprove” germ theory.

      • sad_detective_man@sopuli.xyz
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        3
        ·
        36 minutes ago

        Hobgoblin behavior

  • iamdefinitelyoverthirteen@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    11
    ·
    4 hours ago

    Almost bit into it.

  • AFK BRB Chocolate (CA version)@lemmy.ca
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    10
    ·
    4 hours ago

    I don’t know… It’s pretty hard for The Onion to make an outrageous headline that isn’t also kind of believable these days. I’m not sure this one is more ridiculous than some of the things he’s actually said.

    • KelvarCherry [They/Them]@lemmy.blahaj.zone
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      1
      ·
      41 minutes ago

      I bought it until I saw the community.

  • Clay_pidgin@sh.itjust.works
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    27
    ·
    6 hours ago

    I ate the onion here.

    • Miles O'Brien@startrek.website
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      3
      ·
      2 hours ago

      Yeah this is way WAY too plausible.

  • Rentlar@lemmy.ca
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    3
    ·
    3 hours ago

    I know it’s satire because the real RFK Jr. would say that putting babies in hot cars would cure the baby’s autism caused by Tylenol.

  • paultimate14@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    4
    ·
    5 hours ago

    So like, this is funny. I understand that.

    But also I have to wonder whether the Onion publishing this might lead to some baby actually dying, because people are really that stupid.

  • SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    4
    ·
    5 hours ago

    Shaking them vigorously also helps get the toxins out.

  • thethrilloftime69@feddit.online
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    2
    ·
    4 hours ago

    Onion has been getting me for almost 20 years now

  • notsosure@sh.itjust.works
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    5
    ·
    6 hours ago

    [nasal voice over intercom] Has patient number 13 reveived his sedatives yet?

The Onion and other satire w/ layers@sh.itjust.works

theonion@sh.itjust.works

Subscribe from Remote Instance

Create a post
You are not logged in. However you can subscribe from another Fediverse account, for example Lemmy or Mastodon. To do this, paste the following into the search field of your instance: !theonion@sh.itjust.works

For posting satire from The Onion and other similar sources.

redundancy, but not for its own sake


Be nice. All instance rules apply.


Rules:

  • Be respectful. Everyone should feel welcome here.
  • No bigotry - including racism, sexism, ableism, homophobia, transphobia, or xenophobia.
  • No Ads / Spamming.
  • No pornography.

Règles :

  • Soyez respectueux. Tout le monde doit se sentir le bienvenu ici.
  • Pas de bigoterie - y compris le racisme, le sexisme, le capacitisme, l’homophobie, la transphobie ou la xénophobie.
  • Pas de publicités / Pas de spam.
  • Pas de pornographie.
Visibility: Public
globe

This community can be federated to other instances and be posted/commented in by their users.

  • 128 users / day
  • 151 users / week
  • 342 users / month
  • 342 users / 6 months
  • 4 local subscribers
  • 2.38K subscribers
  • 57 Posts
  • 36 Comments
  • Modlog
  • mods:
  • trashcan@sh.itjust.works
  • BE: 0.19.15
  • Modlog
  • Legal
  • Instances
  • Docs
  • Code
  • join-lemmy.org