Never had a girl fart on my balls, bet it feels amazing.

If changing your name wasn’t such a pain in the arse I’d make my middle name my surname. When I was born I was given my mother’s surname (their relationship was already on the rocks and they split up shortly after). My dad always wanted me to change my surname to his when I became an adult. I considered it but I’m 38 now and I never did. My middle name is his first name, I like the way my first and middle names sound together and I feel that not having either parent’s surname would avoid the baggage.

I’m meeting you halfway you dumb hippies

Indeed

Its like when you’re walking up the stairs in an apartment building and you can smell somebody’s cooking and you’re like “ooh I wonder what they’re cooking.”

But then again, what’s the point?

The good children get Emacs. The bad children also get Emacs.

Wow. What country was this in?

This is fascinating. Do you remember any details? Was it the guy or the woman who was going to be killed? Was there anyone else involved?

Username checks out

Would have been 2003/04, waiting for the bus to college. Dude who looked like a farmer with a huge beard asked “is this the stop for town.” I said yes, sat down, didn’t think anything of it. Few minutes later I noticed his bag was moving. No idea what the hell was in it.

Snuff? Someone’s just casually planning out their own or somebody else’s murder over the phone?

You only get a bucket and a half

I don’t want a lot for Christmas…

Ha, didn’t realise Zorin was paid for. I’ll stick with Debian. Not only is it free, it was made for lesbians who I also whole heartedly support.

This vacuuming is brought you by Squarespace…

Well, I’ve found my drag queen name. Say hello to Laura Zepam.