I mean look at that mugshot. Dude probably hangs dong like a forearm. Probably through a bush thicker than the Amazon rainforest. I don’t know why, but it just looks like when he unsheiths his member it hits the ground like Mjornir. He enters a room full of women and leaves it a mess of puddles and pubes. Probably stays well hydrated too.
Good for him.
Well you didn’t go to the Playboy mansion for the chicken wings.
you go for the…articles.
You’d go Hooter’s for that
good for him.
And he wrote one of the best songs of all time:
Where the butthole ends
i have trouble thinking of him as a children’s author. dude was an autuer and was not limited to children’s poetry. (my favorite rendition of this song is on the muppets)
If they were of legal age and it was consensual then good for him, I guess? Who cares this much about someone else’s love life? Honestly…
Anyone else breathing a sigh of relief that the childrens author with a overactive libido wasn’t diddling kids?
It’s really just nice that he’s going for their moms.
Imagine growing up and one day mom pulls you aside and tells you why you own a autographed copy of “Where the Sidewalk Ends” 💀
As someone who grew up to be a slut I probably would’ve high fived my mom in that scenario, but I understand I’m weird there
Or making anti-semitic comments like Roald “The Little Bastards’ll Swallow Anything” Dahl.
If I recall, Dahl was some sort of secret agent for Britain during WW2. So not all that surprising that he’d be a p.o.s.
It would be like a CIA agent writing children’s books.
Roald Dahl was an RAF pilot during the early days of World War II. He got injured and was discharged because of it. I’ve read his autobiography when I was a child, which was quite interesting. Shame that he was anti-semite.
I mean, Julia Child worked for the OSS during WWII and wasn’t a POS (as far as I know).
Christopher Lee was some sort of agent as well. However, joining the Sith, becoming an vampire, and cutting down the forests of Isengard are kinda dick moves.
Was he really that old?
He’s a vampire wizard, of course he was that old.
But jokes aside, yes. Old enough he witnessed the last public execution by guillotine in France, met Tolkien personally, and while his tales may have grown a bit, he’s one of the inspirations for Ian Fleming’s James Bond. He famously told Peter Jackson people don’t scream when they get stabbed in the back, they just go “uh”. Also performed heavy metal. He’s genuinely pretty badass.
That’s so cool, I never knew that much about him but that really explains his demeanor and facial expressions. No wonder they look so genuine.
My low stakes conspiracy is that Shel Silverstein is actually Grigori Rasputin. I have nothing to support this and I will not be accepting criticism.
Shel wasn’t “born” until 1930, so that kinda works.
I was going to say, and Jason Mantzoukas kind of gives me similar IDK i am going to pursue my art across whatever genre it goes FU i am having fun DEAL WITH IT vibes but he was born 25 years too early. also he is a tv/film guy, not a music/poetry guy so the analogy breaks down but if i am ever at an event with him again i am going to have to tell him the thought occurred to me because i think he would like it.
“Wealthy artist had a lot of sex a hundred years ago”
Shocking
What else is there to do in world before social media? Just make art and fuck.
Man, why did we ever invent social media?
A hundred years ago?
I mean, they are wrong because he was writing up until the late 80s/early 90s, but also the man was born almost 100 years ago… and that’s fuckin wild man.
the man was born almost 100 years ago… and that’s fuckin wild man.
That’s just
lovelife. Nothing you can do about that.
It’s just me kidding around. Exaggeration for comedic effect.
The Wilt Chamberlain of literature
Well that was a relief.
Yeah, the sentence definitely could have used a second draft. OP should write for Hollywod with the range of emotions I just went through.
All in under a minute too.
No idea why, but that range of emotions thing just fucking killed me lmao.
I sure hope it took you less than a minute to read that headline.
hey there were a lot of big words ok!
Well… So long as it was all consensual…
He was giving tree. 😏
As Ozzies say, “rooting”
