i second that. but in phone calls from colleages i hate the “hey, got a moment?” too. i wouldn’t have answered otherwise, or i might have told you i would call you back in a few minutes within my first line?
“Not anymore.” Click.
I set that as my status in Teams along with a little message “Please don’t just say hi. I might not see your follow up” and checked the box to make it show on chats. It’s definitely helped. Also got someone to complain that I was ignoring them, but they just said “hi” and nothing else so my boss sided with me that they were wasting my time without actually asking a question.
I swore there was a version that was a lot more aggressive and in your face.
I have written in a previous job messages, but it usually went like this:
Hello, [Name]! Hope you’re not too busy! I have questions regarding [whatever the fuck it was on about]
Mostly because I hate getting a message and it is just a wall of text, the greeting allows for a slight breathing room and a chance to spot a typo.
But I never left the other hanging, more than a minute to type the needed thing up. If it was taking longer, I would just send it in chunks.
Can I ask you a question?
The solution to this is to not reply to them.
They will either give you the information you need (and potentially learn their lesson for next time), or they’ll get tired of waiting and ask someone else.
When I share that I ignore people who messages with only a “hi”, certain people get real upset. I used to try to be considerate like, “Oh I need to change my communication style” but after a while, I realized every person who gets upset by it was a egotistical asshole in the first place who thinks everyone should wait for them.
So yeah, say what you want to say. I’m not here for you.
100% this. I got this dude who always messages me “hi” when he needs something but doesn’t bother to include what the fuck he needs. I told him, politely, once you can just include everything up front at once and I’ll answer as soon as I can. I just won’t respond to just “hi”. Like fucking hi yourself.
So passive aggressive
Just reply hi
How often does it really happen
I’ve toyed with this a few ways, and my favorite response is waiting 4 hours and replying “hi!” That might mean the next day. Then when they ask the question, wait a couple more hours at least to reply. They’ve set the pace for the conversation this way, and it’s going to be glacial. (Folks who have no urgency get no urgency)
If they ask the right way, I am pretty quick. (Polite people get polite responses)
If it’s something that can wait 20 minutes, I typically wait 20 minutes. (I am a busy person) (Protip: this makes bosses and coworkers think you’re not just fucking around all day, and they respect you more)
Train people using rules, even if they are unspoken, be consistent and it’ll work.
Hi.
Hi.
So, do you have a minute?
Hi.
As per our earlier conversation…
Hello
How’s it going?
Hi! It’s been going really great!
Just wanted to circle back to our previous conversation from before the holidays. Did you get my message?
Great! and you?
This is describing email, not a chat client. If I am chatting with you I expect real time engagement, otherwise I would send an email.
