I’m running an Elder Scrolls campaign so racism is a major theme.
I’m attacking the darkness, I cast magic missile.
🎶Fly by night, a-Mountain Dew! Mountain Dew for you! 🎶
Pooping is done out of combat, consider it like a weak summoning ritual. If you need it to be some sort of roll, a crit will give you +1 on your next roll, a crit fail though, means the summoning wasn’t completely successful, and at some point, the rest of the summon will happen without your input.
counterpoint: pooping is a free action
Yeah, but doffing your armor isn’t.
that’s why you have the rear plate perforated like a colander
You can even attach different shapes like those Play-Dough machines.
fun for the whole party!
Open the iris!
A fraternity at my college got dissolved because they discovered people were doffing armor at the frat house.
You may want to see a doctor
is that a full turn?
That’s more like an interaction with a shop keeper.
…
Please don’t kill Doctor Malice, the half-elf bone saw in this orc village.
diarrhoea is named after rrhoe the goblin, who discovered it by botching a roll to poop twice at the same time.
I have a bonus free action, can I poop twice?
yeah but it goes under two-weapon fighting rules so it’s a flat roll
This is why monks are so fast.
I cast Conjure Feculence!
It’s a ritual? How many other casters do I need there?
Two absolute minimum, six minimum for ranked competitive with ELO
is that an artificially yassified mark mercer
Nah he’s just kinda hot
Matt Mercer plus Christian Bale’s chin, maybe
Nothing wrong with attuning to the barbarian.
It is a hell of a ritual.









